Captain America and the Falcon

This run tied in with the whole Avengers Disassembled thing where Wanda went nuts. It did not do good things for Sam. I had to revisit this for roleplaying reasons, so…

"I took him on like he was you. He ain't you."

Sam and Steve have been tasked with bringing in the Anti-Cap, a super sailor who never even gets a name. Bad luck, kid. He’s like Steve, if Steve was in the Navy and inspired by the Oklahoma City bombing instead of WWII. Oh, and kind of nuts.

"I was improvising."
Right from the start Sam starts taking liberties with the plan, and the plan was pretty crazy to start with. Like, I followed it, I just didn’t follow follow it, ifywim.

Sam's got aim.
Anyway Sam tried to fly in a hurricane and tore his wings the fuck up, so right now he doesn’t have them. He does have guns. Yeah, that’s a little off. And yes, he did just jump off a building onto the top of Steve’s taxi.

Wake up, Luke.
That’s certainly a way to wake up. At least Redwing doesn’t have his sonic cannon yet.

We can't arrest Captain America. This black guy, otoh...
Never mind that he only did all that shit as part of the plan… (Admittedly, breaking his ex out of Gitmo was improvising.)

Did he have to shoot the admiral? Well, no. That was pretty gratuitous, actually. And probably not that smart.

"The rest of us need to invest in your wisdom."
Sam’s always called Steve out on his shit, even when he’s going off the rails.

"I have a Pulitzer!" "Yeah, for 'Booth shoots Lincoln'."
The Falcon has snapped!
At least someone’s noticed.

"The Lord of Wakanda is not your private tailor."
"We're cool under the 'Jimmy did it first' rule."
"I woulda. Twice."
Sam goes from razzing Steve about that whole kinda wanted for treason here, pal thing to razzing him about Wanda sleeping over. What else are friends for?

"He's a big head dude with tiny arms. Don't know how you fight that thing without cracking up."
"Bite the cookie, man. Be the cookie."
I kind of love how Sam’s just sitting there casually reading the newspaper through this whole conversation. “You’re a dick, Steve, looks like we’re having rain this weekend. You think this rifle’s over the top enough?”

"Can't you see there's something wrong with Sam?"
Wait, you mean this is out of character for him??

"Love me them moral codes."
Oh hey, it’s Anti-Cap! Remember him? He’s the guy they’re trying to catch. Sam’s let him out of prison and is now showing blatant disregard for his life. Totally normal day for the Falcon.

"Whatever, you're fired."
"You broke the Anti-Cap out of jail, stole 30 grand from the Rivas and blackmailed a senator."
This is Ali Morales. Sam thinks she wants to get naked and sweaty with Steve. Sam is wrong.

"You said 15 minutes!"
Luckily it’s not like there’s anything important going on that might need their attention.

"I honestly don't know what I'm going to do about Sam."
When the guy who broke the Anti-Cap out of jail, stole 30 (300?) grand from the Rivas and blackmailed a senator just in the last week accuses you of having blatant disregard for someone’s safety you know you’re in trouble."Why not do things the right way?" "Your way, you mean?"

Semi-automatics: the perfect accessory for any outfit, or no outfit at all. (I don’t know guns, okay?)

Anyway, at around this point Sam’s ex’s current (the guy who’s house Sam basically stole) turns up to kill Sam. Sam dares him to and Steve accidentally gets shot. Oops.

…And Sam disappears, never to be seen again until the Winter Soldier turns out to be Bucky Barnes. At some point in the intervening time, he’s gotten sane again, which is probably a relief for everyone.

It’s cool though. Steve was just sleeping, he woke up a few minutes later.

Right there in your folder, it says 'Cap is smarter than this'.
He of course doesn’t have the memo about the Winter Soldier thing so he goes looking for his disappeared insane buddy with wings that come with a pre-installed GPS jammer. Luckily they do have T’Challa’s own transponder in them and the embassy sighs and gives him the code. Unluckily, the transponder is now on a goat’s collar. Bad luck, Steve.



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